The following account is a true story that happened to me last year on Saint Patrick's Day. The story is short and sweet, so no need to go get popcorn or take a bathroom break. It involves a lovely young lady, terrible choices, Saint Patrick's Day, ridiculous Irish tee shirts, and my inevitable lonely death.
To be more direct, my love of great Irish shirts was the reason I missed out on a long and wonderful relationship with a beautiful woman. Well, I can't know that for certain...but that's what I imagine in my head. This woman is stunningly attractive with long brown hair and dark eyes that will swallow you whole. As the wise men known as Hall and Oates once said: She's a man eater. I saw her nearly daily on our ride up to our offices in the morning.
There are times when being drowsy and not in your right head will work totally in your favor. There are times when the girl you want to date steps into an elevator with you and you think in your head that you would like to date her, and your mouth opens up and you say something ridiculous like, "I sure would like to date you." Yeah, I asked her out by accident. Maybe she was sleepy too, because she totally said yes without hesitation.
Since I'm terrible at forward-thinking at 8 in the morning, I forgot completely about St. Patrick's Day being on the same day we planned to meet for dinner and drinks. I was miserable, because there was no way I was going to miss out on my date with this girl! Of course, there's also no way I'm backing out on my yearly bar-hopping with friends in our Irish drinking shirts. I had to figure out how to do both.
I have to warn you that I am a complete moron, so please refrain from emailing me and telling me so. I tell myself all the time. Saying that, here's my imperfect plan to celebrate the greatness of St. Patrick's Day and the wonders of a new date. I figured in my very weak brain that I could possibly do both. The way I planned on accomplishing this feat would be to get ready in my awesome Irish tees before the date, so I would be ready to go right to the bar after dinner. How could this go wrong?
I showed up to the restaurant wearing crazy Irish tshirts, a big green hat in the shape of a shamrock, and a million buttons with various Irish slogans on them. Needless to say, my friends and I go a little nuts every year. I could tell by the looks on my dear date's face when she showed up that she didn't think I was "cute" at all. She looked embarrassed and annoyed mostly.
I don't have to mention that she never accepted one of my many attempts at a second date. I did have a great night after the date, though...so there's some silver lining to that terrible life-lesson I learned that day. Take it from me, friends: girls don't think that silly Irish t-shirts are as awesome as you do, even on St. Patrick's Day.
To be more direct, my love of great Irish shirts was the reason I missed out on a long and wonderful relationship with a beautiful woman. Well, I can't know that for certain...but that's what I imagine in my head. This woman is stunningly attractive with long brown hair and dark eyes that will swallow you whole. As the wise men known as Hall and Oates once said: She's a man eater. I saw her nearly daily on our ride up to our offices in the morning.
There are times when being drowsy and not in your right head will work totally in your favor. There are times when the girl you want to date steps into an elevator with you and you think in your head that you would like to date her, and your mouth opens up and you say something ridiculous like, "I sure would like to date you." Yeah, I asked her out by accident. Maybe she was sleepy too, because she totally said yes without hesitation.
Since I'm terrible at forward-thinking at 8 in the morning, I forgot completely about St. Patrick's Day being on the same day we planned to meet for dinner and drinks. I was miserable, because there was no way I was going to miss out on my date with this girl! Of course, there's also no way I'm backing out on my yearly bar-hopping with friends in our Irish drinking shirts. I had to figure out how to do both.
I have to warn you that I am a complete moron, so please refrain from emailing me and telling me so. I tell myself all the time. Saying that, here's my imperfect plan to celebrate the greatness of St. Patrick's Day and the wonders of a new date. I figured in my very weak brain that I could possibly do both. The way I planned on accomplishing this feat would be to get ready in my awesome Irish tees before the date, so I would be ready to go right to the bar after dinner. How could this go wrong?
I showed up to the restaurant wearing crazy Irish tshirts, a big green hat in the shape of a shamrock, and a million buttons with various Irish slogans on them. Needless to say, my friends and I go a little nuts every year. I could tell by the looks on my dear date's face when she showed up that she didn't think I was "cute" at all. She looked embarrassed and annoyed mostly.
I don't have to mention that she never accepted one of my many attempts at a second date. I did have a great night after the date, though...so there's some silver lining to that terrible life-lesson I learned that day. Take it from me, friends: girls don't think that silly Irish t-shirts are as awesome as you do, even on St. Patrick's Day.
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