Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Deer Hunting T-Shirts Are Upsetting The Locals

By Tommy Bendis


When you grow up in the deep south, there are some fundamental things that you get accustomed to seeing. It's no big deal to see a jacked-up, 4X4 truck covered in dried mud cruising through town. It really doesn't raise too many eyebrows when you see someone wearing a gun openly on their hip. When hunting season hits, you can bet your socks that there are going to be guys wearing deer hunting t-shirts with truck-beds full of dead deer.

When you grow up in the south, you get used to seeing stuff like that. Nearly everyone I know wears deer hunting t-shirts at least once a week. I loved living in Tennessee, and I wish I never had to move out here to crazy land. When you get a great job offer and have a family that's counting on you, then sometimes you have to just pack up your life and take it out to California to teach those city boys how you properly work an oil field.

It's not my accent or my general style of walking and talking that turns people off out here in California. Just look at how well Matthew McConaughey has done with it. The atmosphere is super diverse out here, and as long as you're willing to let go of your roots you can completely phase into the society. What they will not accept, though, is the idea of a hunter. Animal activists run everything out here, and don't make the mistake of being caught out in public wearing deer hunting t-shirts.

California prides itself on its accepting nature. Unlike most of my kin back home, I have absolutely no problem with the gays. Do whatever you need to do to be happy, buddy. Liberals are okay people too if you give them a chance to talk about something other than politics. I think that I can be just as accepting as any of these other folks out here, so how is it they can't bring themselves to accept me? I used to wear deer hunting t-shirts 6 days a week back home, but if I wear them for one minute outside of my home I get told that I'm a murderer by some animal rights blowhard.

I can't get done with this God-awful work contract fast enough. Once I get done, me and my family are going to ditch this Beverly Hillbillies routine and move back home. Hopefully, this contract will have helped us pay for a home out of pocket, which will be amazing. I'll be able to wear whatever deer hunting t-shirts I please, and no one is going to get mad at me. Well, my wife got used to me wearing polo shirts, so she may get a little mad...but I think we'll be just fine back in the south where we belong.




About the Author:



No comments: